Telepylos

Summary

Following a few nights at the Island of the Cyclopes, I didn't think I would find a single place in the entire universe that would give worse service to their guests. It certainly seemed so, until I met the Laistrygones of Telephylos.

Polyphemus certainly, on reflection, was reasonably civilized by comparison. He only ate four of my crew members. The Laistrygones, on the other hand, ate an entire fleet. Not only that, but they also obliterated all but one of our ships. This is definitely the worst service I have come across in my lifetime. I believe I can safely say we received better from the Trojans even while we were at war with them.

Ultimately, of all the things I have learnt in my ten year travel to Ithaca, perhaps the most important is never take accommodation anywhere owned by Poseidon's children.

Travelling Advice

Quite simple really. Don't go. As I said above, if it belongs to or is owned by any relation of Poseidon, especially his children, avoid like the plague. Poseidon's children are all monsters (Please don't tell him I said that).

Overall Score

Laestrygonians. Avoid at all costs

Service: 0/10- They killed almost all my colleagues. Don't trust them to take care of your ship either. I feel bad about giving Polyphemus' service a zero now. 

Food: 0/10- We were the main course. Need I say more?

Rooms: 0/10- Didn't get to try them. We were chased off the island not long after arrival

Overall Score: 0/30

References

https://teamegyptwiki.wikispaces.com/file/view/laestrygonians.jpg/74165825/351x281/laestrygonians.jpg